This week, my parents are celebrating their 25th wedding anniversary. Because my little brother and I are both currently “between opportunities” (read: neither of us have jobs and have a total of zero real commitments to speak of) we have had the unique pleasure of being included in (read: dragged along on) their week-long romantic getaway around Northern California.
The first three days of the trip were spent in San Francisco, and were actually quite enjoyable. We did all of the touristy things the city had to offer (Alcatraz! Cable Cars! Sea Lions!) and drank a ton of Margaritas.
On day four, after a six hour wait for a rental car that was big enough to fit all of our luggage, we headed up to the Napa Valley for two days of wine tasting.
We got to the Los Carneros Inn, and the minute we were inside the gates it was clear that it was the most romantic place I had ever been. Partly because there were two weddings taking place, partly because they put a glass of wine in my hand when I arrived and it somehow never emptied for 76 hours straight.
The whole place was breathtaking. There was a gorgeous pool, private cottages and a 360-Degree view of the vineyards. Within the first three minutes, I had already decided that it was where I was going to get married to the next guy who responded to me on Hinge (looking at you, Brian G.).
Upon checking in, we were informed that the resort had no double beds and no cots, because, why would they? Their target demographic is 100% couples. Not, apparently, families of four with two adult children. Richard would be sleeping in an armchair.
Our room was filled with every amenity you would ever want on your honeymoon: an indoor/outdoor shower with six shower heads, a private fenced in garden and hot tub, countless brochures for the best place to go to get a couples massage/mud bath, and a bottle of champagne welcoming “Mr and Mrs Weiner” to the Los Carneros Inn.
For the next four days, Richard and I went to wine tastings, candlelit dinners and even horseback riding on the beach surrounded by couples. The worst was when people assumed we were newly engaged or married as almost everyone we met was, and I had to tell them “nope! I’m super single and here with my brother!” (and he would then feel the need to tell them ” yeah and I have a girlfriend”– WE GET IT.) So, if you are looking for a destination for your next romantic getaway, I would highly suggest Napa Valley. And if you’re single, just go with your brother! (JK DON’T)